2003-03-19

isadora took her shoes off because they were uncomfortable
uh oh.i'm supposed to be in ballet right now. i missed yesterday too. i had a melt down yesterday and when i got to school i fell asleep in a sunbeam by a door. last night i had a headache that felt like it could be a migrane so i took a tylenol 3 which knocks me out good. i slept until 10...officially i haven't skipped class yet, it doesn't start for another twenty minutes. so...but i'm falling apart. my toe is all fucked up. i don't know if it's just badly bruised inside or if i sprained it or if i have a stress fracture. as it's hurting right in the jointy bone. i couldn't do ballet even if i was there anyway...

talked with lysa for an hour after rehearsal last night. we both hate school for the same reasons. things are getting out of hand. i can't handle being told what to do. i go nuts. i will delibrately do the opposite of what i'm being told to do. i think i'm going to fire all my dancers in my piece and start over. in my t3 state of mind last night i decided that i should do a duet on lysa and emily. i'm not having fun with ash leigha and al. the chemistry really isn't there between us. and they all look at me in rehearsal and i don't see anything. and when they do my movement i don't like how it looks. i'm so done with this it's incredible.

Posted at 10:11 a.m. [last / next]